040. Uncover the Unspoken Feelings of Kids in Blended Families [Special Resource: In Their Shoes]
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Have you ever been frustrated or confused by your kids or stepkids?
Maybe it feels like they just don't like their step-parent. Maybe they give you the silent treatment or cop an attitude over seemingly meaningless things. You want to be understanding, but it's just so frustrating!
Part of that frustration might actually be misunderstanding. It's hard for your kids to see life from your perspective — and the opposite is true too. It's just as challenging for you to see life from their perspective.
That's where Lauren Reitsema comes in and we're sharing about her book In Their Shoes in this episode.
Lauren is a child of divorce and became a step-child after both her parents remarried. Through her profession in communication as well as her personal experience growing up in a blended family, Lauren is able to uncover the unspoken feelings of children living in a blended family dynamic.
We'll be highlighting one concept from the book called 'Step-Parentification', which is an easy pitfall we can inadvertently fall into. We'll explore how to avoid this unproductive approach with our kids and offer Lauren's practical tips for stepparents to thrive, even while feeling rejected, hurt, and disappointed.
Getting into your kid's shoes and seeing things from their perspective can make a big difference in your blended family. True understanding will impact your kid's well-being and also help you to feel more grounded — even when things seem to be taking a downward spiral.
You'll Discover:
Why it's important to look at the kid's 'bigger story’, not just their behavior
Why step-kids can seem insensitive and self-centered
Why a step-parent's attempts to acknowledge a step-child often go unreciprocated
What is 'step-parentification' and how does it negatively impact the kids
3 healthy ways for stepparents to manage their own hurts and emotions
Why Lauren's book 'In Their Shoes' is a must-read resource for you
Resources from this Episode:
Episode 39 — How to Create Strong Bonds with Resistant Step-Kids
Episode 37 — Why do Kids Struggle to Accept Their Stepparent?
Episode 34 — How to Avoid Mother's Day Disappointment
Get the Book: In Their Shoes: Helping Parents Better Understand and Connect with Children of Divorce
Ready for personalized support? Schedule your free coaching call
We all need some extra support along the blending journey — we're here to help. You can connect with us for a free coaching call to see how we might help you experience more clarity, confidence, and connection in your home. Schedule your free call here: https://calendly.com/mikeandkimcoaching/freesession
Feeling overwhelmed and not sure where to start?
With so many episodes available here on the show, it might feel a bit overwhelming to find the topics that matter most to you. That's why we've created the Blended Family Breakthrough Quiz which will direct you to the most impactful episodes that pertain to you personally.
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